Thursday, 12 April 2012

A crisis of confidence

I have these regularly and they are part of being a person who makes things. Sometimes the things you make turn out to be rubbish, sometimes you don't make them because you think they might be rubbish and sometimes - thank goodness - the things you make aren't rubbish. 

When people ask what you do for a living, and ask if you make any money out of it - that's when confidence starts to crack and tumble to the floor. And when you hear about other peoples' success or publication - it shouldn't be worrying, but it is. Mortgages - they make me worry. A future in writing -don't be ridiculous!

But daft as it sounds - and it does sound daft to me - I have to do it. I have to make things - it's what I do. And although I'd love to make money from writing one day, I'd love to get 'spotted,' I'm not in a hurry and perhaps I'm not good enough yet.

Still, slow and steady wins the race, doesn't she? I am very slow - not sure about steady - but 50% isn't bad. And what race am I trying to win, anyway? I'm not sure.

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